Saturday, August 11, 2012

Should My Boyfriend Be Invited?

Dear Jocelyn,
I have been dating my boyfriend for 5 years. We are high school sweet hearts (I am 20 years old). I am also the youngest cousin in my family, and my family has always thought of me as the baby. I am in college, but I still live with my parents. We recently just got invited to my cousins wedding. She just turned 40 and I am so glad that she has found the one! Our invitation was addressed to 'The [Family Name]' and on the inside of the invitation is says to write down 'how many guests are attending'.

If I have 3 people in my household, do I write down 4?

Should I ask if I am allowed to bring my boyfriend? Who do I ask? The bride? The bride's parents? I know weddings are expensive, but my boyfriend has become a part of my family as well. I don't want to be rude at all! I also will not be mad if she says no. I just don't want the bride to feel like she has been pushed into something.
-Trying Not To Be Pushy

Dear Trying,
Wedding invitations should be addressed to each individuals by name (including children and dates) to avoid this kind of confusion. Since they left it open ended, you are perfectly within your rights to email or call the bride and ask if your boyfriend may attend. You have the exact right attitude about it - you can be hopeful that she says yes, but not bitter if she says no. It is kind of you to understand the pressures and expenses of modern weddings, and it might help for you to say that during your request.

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